Control and manipulation are not love; the outcome is a life of imprisonment ultimately leading to deep-rooted feelings of resentment. Ken Poirot (Poy-row)
Control. It is one of humanity’s greatest addictions. We crave it. We seek it. And we believe that if we obtain it, the high we feel will equate to happiness.
But it doesn’t. And it never will.
In our last episode, we talked about the addiction to the approval of others – a cheap imitation of divine love. Today, we will delve into the gripping addiction of control, which cloaks itself as a pathway to peace, but in reality, robs us of the very thing we seek.
Here is the addiction cycle. We feel anxiety within – something isn’t quite right. And all we can think of is quelling that gnawing sense of angst that grows within. Our normal response alleviate anxiety is to seek an outward change in scenery or circumstance or the subservience of our royal subjects. And to induce this desired change, we create a strategy.
This strategy requires rules. Rules like, “If I can just be left alone for the first 30 minutes of the morning with my coffee, then I’ll be happy.” Or maybe, “No car is allowed in the passing lane if it isn’t passing or I will be unjustifiably hindered and upset.” These are just a few, simple and almost comical rules that some of us have. But this addiction is no laughing matter. Some of us have complicated, deep-seated rules that are seldom met and leave us riddled with anxiety.
Some rules are, let’s be honest, must-haves. For example, “I must be free of abuse in order to be at peace” is a valid rule. But today we’re talking about rules that go beyond basic needs and fall into the category of entitlement.
When we feel entitled, we create rules or we appropriate existing rules that we think will get us what we desire. And we almost always tailor the rules so that they benefit us, even if it means that others are shut out from getting what they want. Control subjugates others. They become necessary slaves to our rules.
The logical conclusion of this strategy of living – this addiction to control – is increased anxiety, fleeting pleasures, never-ending stalemates between your rules and those of others, exhaustion, and unhappiness. Like a long-time addict, the pursuit of the “control” substance takes a terrible toll.
There is an alternative, though. A way that leads to freedom from addiction and the experience of true peace.
And that is the subject of today’s episode.
Source Scripture
Relinquish Control: Matthew 12:1-8; Mark 2:23-28; Luke 6:1-5
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Twitter: @AwestruckPod
Email: info@awestruckpodcast.com
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Wonder is like grace, in that it’s not a condition we grasp; it grasps us. Wonder is not an obligatory element in the search for truth. We can seek truth without wonder’s assistance. But seek is all we’ll do; there will be no finding. Unless wonder descends, unlocks us … truth is unable to enter. Wonder may be the aura of truth, the halo of it. Or something even closer. Wonder may be the caress of truth, touching our very skin. – David James Duncan
When our search for truth has an underlying aim to understand for the sake of harnessing the power of knowledge to serve the ego’s desires, then search results are poor. There are results – but they are not true. They are simply a heap of usefulfacts we place in our arsenal and protect with fierce confirmation bias.
The difference between truth and fact, for the purposes of this episode, is this: a fact is a mere neutral atom of information. The ego seizes upon the presence of these facts as leverage, studying each atom to form a periodic table of elements with which it then experiments and builds compounds that best serve its desires.
Truth, however, is not neutral. Truth is like light. It radiates. Warms. Enlightens. Heals. Captivates. It envelops the ego like a pearl does an irritant, leaving only beauty in its place.
C.S. Lewis captures the essence of the difference between fact and truth this way in his book The Abolition of Man.
For the wise men of old the cardinal problem had been how to conform the soul to reality, and the solution had been knowledge, self-discipline, and virtue. For magic and applied science alike the problem is how to subdue reality to the wishes of men: the solution is a technique; and both, in the practice of this technique, are ready to do things hitherto regarded as disgusting and impious….. If we compare the chief trumpeter of the new era (Bacon) with Marlowe’s Faustus, the similarity is striking. You will read in some critics that Faustus has a thirst for knowledge. In reality, he hardly mentions it. It is not truth he wants from his devils, but gold and guns and girls. ‘All things that move between the quiet poles shall be at his command’ and ‘a sound magician is a mighty god’. In the same spirit Bacon condemns those who value knowledge as an end in itself: this, for him, is to use as a mistress for pleasure what ought to be a spouse for fruit. The true object is to extend Man’s power to the performance of all things possible. He rejects magic because it does not work but his goal is that of the magician.
In other words, the difference between fact and truth lies largely in the endgame of the observer. To the one seeking to subdue reality to his wishes, there are only facts. To the one seeking to align her soul with reality, there is truth.
Truth is divine. Information is human. The purpose behind the quest for truth determines the quality of the search results.
Today we will see how Jesus confronts the religious leaders of his day with this important distinction, where he reminds them – and us – that it is the Way of Truth that leads to life.
Source Scripture
Four Score: John 5:31-40
Connect
Twitter: @AwestruckPod
Email: info@awestruckpodcast.com
Extras
I wish we could sometimes love the characters in real life as we love the characters in romances. There are a great many human souls whom we should accept more kindly, and even appreciate more clearly, if we simply thought of them as people in a story.” ― G.K. Chesterton
Our eyes capture the images we upside down on the retina, but our brain turns them right-side up again so that what we see is oriented accurately.
Our minds – our rational thoughts – do the same thing as our eyes when it comes to our circumstances.
Our minds process what is going on around us, but what we understand is upside down as it were. Our souls are what make everything right, orienting the external events within their proper context.
If our brains did not reorient the retina’s misleading images, we would find ourselves stumbling and holding tightly to walls as our feet carried us tentatively through the world. Likewise, if we do not allow our souls to orient us to see the real view of the world we need to see, our lives will be filled with chaos.
Take, for example, the way we see the fortune, or misfortune of another human being. If this person is close to us, we may find ourselves properly oriented by the power of love. We rejoice with them when they rejoice and we grieve with them when they grieve. If, however we observe someone we have chosen not to love – whether due to distance or grievance – we find ourselves somewhere on a spectrum of apathy at best and schadenfreude at worst.
Schadenfreude – or the attitude of sinister glee over the misfortune of another – is a pristine example of the ego blocking the soul’s work to orient the scene. The ego has left us seeing upside down, and though we may feel a temporary tingle of satisfaction, in the long run it poisons our ability to love even those close to us.
When we allow the soul to do its work, and we observe the misfortune of another, we respond with an inward empathy that drives an outward compassion. We strive to take measures that might relieve that grief or trouble. We may even go so far as, when possible, to reach into the well of our resources to help transform the other’s anguish into joy.
The culmination of the soul’s work in such a situation is a correlative joy with the other. Though we did not personally experience the beginning grief or final elation, we find ourselves inextricably bound, soul to soul, and share the joy. As the Swedish proverb says, shared joy is double joy.
The Sanskrit word mudita captures the essence of the human soul’s ability – its longing – to bring joy to others and share that joy. Mudita is the subject of today’s podcast.
Source Scripture
Muditation: John 2:1-11
Connect
Twitter: @AwestruckPod
Email: info@awestruckpodcast.com
Extras
Man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much — the wheel, New York, wars and so on — whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man — for precisely the same reasons. Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.
Self-worth is a core value that none of us question. We all want value, purpose, and love.
The reason we struggle with securing self-worth is two-fold: 1) We equate self-worth with feelings and emotions, which are the deepest part of the ego but only the shallows of the soul. And 2) We spend our lives devising schemes that will attend to our ego’s perceived needs, which do little or nothing for the soul, leaving us exhausted and discontent.
Today we’ll take an honest look at the goals we set in pursuit of self-worth to see how and why they may be missing the mark. We’ll also go deeper in order to realign our very definition of self-worth, which will inherently alter our way of life. Our quality of life.
Source Scripture
Nothing is Everything: Matthew 2:19-23
Connect
Twitter: @AwestruckPod
Email: info@awestruckpodcast.com
Extras